'if lesbians use dildos why don't they just have sex with a man?'
'if straight men like fucking women in the ass why don't they just fuck men?'
Finally, a brilliant response to a dumb question.
Whoever wants to eat cookie dough and not get salmonella. Here ya go!
Every woman? EVERY PERSON ON EARTH, MARS, OR WHEREVER THE HELL YOU ARE SHOULD HAVE THIS RECIPE.
you know since “fuck” and other swears have become such a regular part of my vocabulary they’ve begun to lose impact
so instead I’ve come to realize I’m using non swear words like “heck” for some sort of twisted ironic emphasis
I have come full circle
gristol: Version II of my sphinx - we had to design a teacher for the Harry Potter universe - mine is a Indian sphinx who was taken during the British rule of India and kept as a decorated pet of sorts until she was freed later and is now a librarian at Hogwarts.
my roommate is 2 days younger than me so i’ve gotten into the habit of saying “when i was your age..” and then describing what i did 2 days ago
every 5 seconds a woman gives birth to a baby. stop this woman.